Not-so-Smart meters

I have switched energy suppliers.  After several years with E.On, I've left them and joined First Utility.

Last year, when I compared energy prices, E.On was predicted to be only about £20 per year more expensive than the cheapest supplier.  Hardly worth bothering, I reckoned.  This year, though, in spite of falling energy prices, E.On have chosen to raise their tariffs, which seemed a little odd. I suppose though, that if you are losing customers to cheaper-priced competitors, it makes business sense to raise your prices and maintain profits at the expense of your remaining customer base, rather than cut your prices for everyone.

Interestingly, when E.On learned of my imminent departure, they emailed to emphasise how much I was saving through their Dual Fuel Allowance, Direct Debit payments and Fixed Term Contract.  Not a word about the actual cost of gas or electricity in terms of kW/hour.

All the Cost Comparison sites I tried came up with similar results.  Here's MoneySupermarket.com's offering —

The top 5 are not rated highly for customer service – some because they've only just arrived in the market place – so, for about £23 extra, I chose First Utility.  I'm still feeling bruised from a dust-up with EDF's super-inefficient customer services and don't relish a repeat. None-the-less, a potential saving of £242 in the coming year isn't at all bad. Au Revoir, E.On.

On thing the nice people from E.On did do, a couple of year ago, was to install a Smart Meter, or rather two Smart meters (gas and electricity) and a readout device.  Here's the gas end of the business...

... and here's the thingamajig for reading it.

Yes, that is the Book of Common Prayer next to it.  The collect for The Conversion of St Paul seems more than a little appropriate —

Grant, we beseech Thee, that we, having his wonderful conversion in remembrance...  

Well this wonderful conversion from E.On to First Utility will entail an engineer coming to remove E.On's gas and electricity smart meters and substitute First Utility's own equally smart ones.  

Am I the only person who finds this a bit daft? If I get a taste for swapping energy suppliers (as I already have for home and car insurers) will someone come here every year or so to install new 'smart' meters and take away the old ones?  Or perhaps, one day, some smart person will invent a truly smart meter that reprograms itself, each time I swap suppliers?  For a race of beings that can land a rover on Mars and invent Dairy Spread, that doesn't seem too big a problem, does it? Though, now I think about it, whoever invented Dairy Spread has a lot to answer for.

I'm dreaming of a warm, grey, wet, white, still or stormy Christmas

Here in the Forest of Dean, the nearest we've got in recent 
years to a White Christmas was a substantial snow fall on 
January 18th, 2013.  This is Lydney on that snowy morning.

The British seem obsessed with the weather.  It all comes, I'm sure, from living in a temperate climate, in which summers may be baking hot, or cool and wet, and the winter snows may be deep and crisp and even, or the winter muds deep and warm and boggy.

Along with this obsession comes, unsurprisingly, one for weather forecasts.  In my teenage years I took quite an interest in the subject myself and might well have perused a career in meteorology. I had a Stephenson Screen in the back garden and recorded temperatures and rainfall for several years.

The Meteorological Office tell us that the quality of their forecasts has been improving, and I believe them.  However, the way in which others interpret those forecasts — especially the tabloid press — risks giving the whole weather forecasting business a bad name.

Back on October 21st the Daily Mirror proclaimed

Britain set for white Christmas?  

36 days of snow forecast after 'coldest Atlantic for 80 years'  

"36 days of snow," mark you.  That's an impressive amount for these isles, even if you reside in the north of Scotland.

AOL News latched on to the story too:

Britain could be set for a White Christmas as temperatures are set to plummet to -16C, say forecasters.
Bookmakers have slashed the odds on a snowy Christmas Day, with Ladbrokes placing London at 7/1. Some weather forecasters believe Britain could be in for the coldest winter since the Big Freeze in December 2010, when temperatures dropped to -21C.
The Metro reports that some weather experts have predicted 36 days of snow and ice.
The reason? Scientists say the melting of the Greenland ice sheet is to blame as it's slowing the Gulf Stream, pushing cold temperatures towards Britain.

Ah, so it's all down to Global Warming. What isn't, these days? Yet all this seemed so unlikely that I filed the story away and waited to see what would happen.  Well, you've guessed it.  Here's what the Daily Mirror had to say on December 16th, in a story about Saharan dust engulfing the nation (my underlining):

It comes as Britain basks in a freakish mid-winter hot spell as forecasters say we could be heading for the mildest Christmas on record.  Thermometers are set to rocket to 17C widely with even Scotland and the north seeing highs of 13C this week.

Poor forecasters!  I rest my case.

Profit Margains

This photo is little me, fearlessly putting the finishing touches to my roof tiles after a friend and I had replaced some rotten roof felt. You won't be surprised to know that I never trained as a roofer, but there's little on the practical side that I 'm unwilling to have a go at, given some expert guidance and the right tools. Well, so long as the job isn't too big or too strenuous, that is.

That guttering is a bit of a problem, though. It's called Finlock and was popular about 50 years ago.  No nasty metal gutters to rust, and no flimsy plastic ones to crack and become unsightly.  This stuff was designed to last as long as the house... but it doesn't.

The technically minded among you may notice that it spans the cavity between the inside and outside walls. Unfortunately, after a few decades it cracks and leaks rainwater down the cavity, and the next thing you know is that damp patches appear on the inside walls.  I have damp patches on my lounge wall.  O dear!

Replacing that lot is far beyond my modest abilities, so I contacted a local builder who has been most helpful in the past, but he was fully committed for the next few months. Coincidentally, a national company (that had better remain nameless) wrote and asked if they could provide a quotation for the work. I accepted.

Their salesman was delightful.  He stroked the cats, drank my coffee, complimented me on my knitted cardigan (actually somebody else's knitting, but I dishonestly accepted the praise) and told me that the work would cost £4600.  I gulped.  "Well, if you put up one of our advertising boards, write a nice letter of recommendation and become our Facebook friend, we'll cut the price to £3800." I still looked glum and said that I'd first contact my builder friend.

A few days later, a letter arrived.  The price had magically dropped to £2500.  I sat tight. Then yesterday, they phoned to say that, if I promised not to tell anyone about the amazing deal I was getting, they would do the work 'at cost' for £2300 - half the original price!  "That's still pretty high," my builder friend told me, and I believe him.

I really don't deny anyone an honest living, so if they can persuade folk to accept their offers, I wish them well. Caveat Emptor! But next time someone knocks on your door, offering to replace your windows, fix the roof that you thought was okay, or renew your leaky gutters, shop around and don't ever accept the first price they quote. I reckon that labour, transport and materials for my job would have cost that company, at most, £1600.  So, had I accepted the final offer, they would have made about £700 on a day's work.  Not bad, I suppose, for a large company with high overheads.  But the first price quoted?  £2000 profit for a day's work is certainly the way to grow rich.  Nice work, if you can get it, I say.

Helston 2, maybe 3

Yes, yes, I know that Mabe is pronounced like babe, and the road sign almost certainly doesn't exist anyway, but this is a bit of West Cornwall humour.

Many love Cornwall in the summer. Some like it most in the Spring and Autumn, when roads and beaches are quieter. I like it then, too, but it's during December that I'm apt to feel most homesick.  True, at this time of the year, if it isn't blowing a hoolie, then the place is probably shrouded in fine mizzle (a combination of mist and drizzle) but it's what goes on indoors — and occasionally around Christmas Trees in town squares — that is special.

Mabe always calls to my mind the incomparable Mabe Ladies' Choir and that, in turn, leads on to thoughts of the many other Cornish choirs and singing groups who make Cornish Christmases quite unlike any other in the Kingdom.  Perhaps the best known composer of Cornish carols is Thomas Merritt (1863-1908) who turned the rather dull Advent carol Hark, the Glad Sound into something that's truly glad and uplifting. Here it is (once they get started :) ), being sung in Truro Cathedral...

Another Cornish favourite is While Shepherds Watched, not to that rather plain 4-line dirge one usually hears, but to the tune Lyngham. There's nothing Cornish about the words or the tune, but it is hugely popular in churches and chapels throughout the county, perhaps because it has similar harmonies and 'repeats' to Hark, the Glad Sound. I just love this rendition by the Caroryon Trewoon singers, one Christmas morning in Troon... and well done, that sole lady!  It wouldn't have been the same without her.

Sadly, now that I live outside Cornwall, it's quite hard to spot the events at which one may hear Cornish carol singing, and still harder the ones where one may join in the singing, as they're not well advertised.  If I can find one, though, I'm sorely tempted to spend a night or two down there and go along.